Long time no post! I have a bit of a problem. My one and only bridesmaid has become pregnant (even though it wasn't planned and she wasn't interested in being off anyway...) and understandably said she can't come to my wedding. Course I don't expect her to abort it at all. So I'm stuck. We are getting married in Gretna on 050515 with 12 guests then coming back to a Devon to celebrate. I don't know who to have as a bridesmaid. There is obviously me. my h2b, best woman, her partner, my h2b dad, mum, future brother in law and his wife,my mum and brother along with two work colleagues. My options are to have a bridesmaid is my h2b sister in law who is lovely but can't afford the hen do, my female work colleague who I've known for 2 years or my brother. This is a very untraditional wedding as I've already mentioned our best man is a woman, my mum is giving me away, so I'm currently thinking of my brother being my bridesman, or whatever it's called. He'a going to do a speech on behalf of my mum anyway. But do you think this is a suitable option and what does he wear? Help!!
CommentAuthorkittyh
To be honest I wouldn't bother having a bridesmaid if your only bridesmaid is not able to attend the wedding anymore. You don't have to have a bridesmaid at all, I don't think I would have one just for the sake of it and i know lots of brides on here aren't having BMs. If you want to include your brother in the wedding he could always wear a co-ordinating outfit to your husband or wear a tie in the colours of the wedding?
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
You could have your SIL anyway, but there's no reason not to have your brother. He could wear a suit in wedding colours, or a tie in the colour with a black or grey suit. You don't have to have anyone though, it just depends on what support you want in the morning and who will be able to provide it.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorclairenina
I got married last month, and I chose not to have any bridesmaids at all. I'm glad I did, no regrets
CommentAuthorRaeA
I think that having your brother as a bridesmaid is a fab idea! How does he feel about it?
My H2B would like me to have a bridesmaid as he doesn't want me walking on my own or worrying about things. I do have my mum walking me down the isle but we've not been getting on lately. We just about talk. Or I was thinking about having my female work colleague who I've known for around 2 years and is really helpful and nice but I'm scared she will think I'm just asking her as I don't have a bridesmaid and what other people think. I know I shouldn't worry about that!
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
The question is will your work colleague make the day work better for you. If she will help you and remove stress then certainly consider it, but don't ask her for the sake of having a bridesmaid. Only ask her if you think she really will make the day work better for you. I knew who my matron of honour would be straight away, partly because she is my best friend but also because I knew that she would solve any problem, and that I could absolutely rely on her. I turned out to be spot on, when a couple of uninvited guests appeared at the reception she dealt with it politely but firmly and I didn't have to worry. You need people around you on the day that you know you can turn to for any problems, whether it's sending someone running up the stairs for something in your room because the stairs are a pain when you're in the dress, or whether it's chasing up someone who hasn't appeared, or whether it's dealing with a guest that has become drunk and disorderly. That could be a bridesmaid, a brides man, an usher, or a parent, but you need to work out who will fill the role best and then work out where in the party they belong.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
