Hiya everyone. We are trying to sort out a guest list for day & night. We put together our lists then asked our mums to look at it, too see if anyone is missed. They have said there is people they would like there during the day. The extra number is going to total about 12-16 people on top. The guests they want to invite is mostly people they were brought up with that my partner & I don't really know. Just looking for everyone's thoughts on this are? These extra guests are wanted by our mums for during the day. We have a budget for around 80 day guests and have got list of about 90 who we want there to see our special day, this is not including these extra guests. Just wondering what people would do in this situation. As don't want to upset anyone!! Eeek :-(
CommentAuthorSonya
Sorry I don't get this whole parents inviting their friends thing?!? Are your parents paying? If not I'd just use money as the reason for saying no. H2b's mum asked on Friday if she could invite 2 couples so I just said I didn't want anyone at my wedding I didn't know. H2b was a little more diplomatic and said we couldn't afford it but I wanted to make it clear it wasn't just the money in case she offered to pay for them. I don't know them, they have no impact on mine and h2b's day life so why should they share my day?? If h2b's mum was having an anniversary party for example would you expect to invite your friends that they don't know??
Became Mrs Mulholland on September 12th 2014!!!
CommentAuthor*The NewMrsMalin*
Yeah I agree with Sonya; unless they are paying then you shouldn't have to accommodate anyone that you don't know.
Met in 2009
Got together on12th May 2011, proposed on the 12th May 2013
When you get knocked down; smile and pick yourself up again!
Fight for what you believe in!
CommentAuthorMrsH-2B
I really don't get parents wanting people there, it's their child's wedding, not theirs.. My mum wouldn't dream of inviting people we don't know xxx
I can't wait to become his Wife :-)
4th July 2015
CommentAuthorLauraK7
edited
I don't get the parents inviting friends thing either it's your wedding not theirs
I agree, it's your day, I'd compromise and say they can come for the evening.. if your happy with that? But I don't understand why parents want people at their children's weddings either.
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
Right this is what you do "mum, we only have budget for this many people, (we may be able to ad addtional 2 people, but thats all) If you want anyone extra to come then its this much ____ per extra guest, you have all your family there who will want to talk to mother of the bride/groom, else we can just give them a evening invite"
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorCoral
Have had a similar problem I cut a most my friends to the evening as they live locally to allow for people from my other half's family and friends who have a long journey and accommodation costs to come all day and the in-laws have agreeded to pay for every one on their side over the 25 people from his half of the package deal which they should seeing as they decided to add 30+ people including OHs ex girl friend and the guys his dad works with You just need to be brutal you don't want this kind of mess
CommentAuthorkatielea100
Say no! It's not their wedding I didn't even ask my mum or Ohs mum to check the list! My mum wouldn't be bothered who came anyway she's not a monster unlike my FMIL she would want every tom dick harry and even an Edward if she could find them lol She doesn't know who's invited to what bit yet bit after her inviting friends me n tom never met to our engagement party and not telling us and even buying herself a new engagement ring n butting in to show it off when people asked to see mine, she's having nothing to do with my wedding planning lol xx
CommentAuthorMarrying.Ryan
I havent even asked anyone else who I should invite. It's your and H2Bs decision. not your mum or MIL. You invite who you want. I would just say to them, thanks for your suggestions, but we can only invite 80 guests and we would need to not invite people who we are very close to in order to invite your friends. So this is not an option.
CommentAuthorLauraK7
I haven't asked them either I did check with my mum about some of my dad's brother and sisters oh's names but that was it She did start saying how about so and so just flat out said there was no room and extra adults are £50 a head and that other family members cousins etc will just have to come to the evening
CommentAuthorVelcro
I don't get why they want people there you don't even know, its your wedding not an excuse for some sort of wrinkly reunion. Unless, they want to foot the bill, that is?
if you're already over the guest list numbers, then just tell them. Im sure tyou were only asking incase you'd missed some one off really obvious, not as a free for all to add all and sundry (I forgot to add my brother lol)
Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
CommentAuthorShowgirl
We came up with our lists and alloted our parents x number of guests each in case we'd forgotten anyone. Any extra guests beyond that will just have to come in the evening.
CommentAuthorAmyH608
Omg sounds just like us lol!! Its been a nightmare and still ongoing even tho the invites have been sent out.
We've said all along we dont want people we know there, just be firm with everyone, maybe compromise (we had to) and invite some of them to the evening! Good Luck xx
CommentAuthorRachelE118
My first wedding (19 yrs and 2 teenaged children ago) was really my parents wedding it was mainly their friends as they were paying for the whole lot. Now this time is very different! Obviously we're paying but my life has changed so much and mum lives 100 miles away so poor thing will hardly know anyone!!
