Tell her now as soon as possible...to me, I think it's unreasonable to be mad if people can't afford to pay to go abroad or away on a hen do....I'd balk at paying £350 myself regardless of Xmas and my own wedding, to be honest,...some people spend less than that on there annual holiday.

I'm sure she will understand....and with spends on top it's probably gonna come to much more...I doubt your going to get much change out of £500...

Just sit her down and tell her that you're really sorry but you just can't afford it, and that you'll do something special with her closer to the time.

I imagine a lot of hens will be feeling the same too, and it might not even go ahead yet...xx

I would tell her ASAP, other people may have the same issue and this could provide her with some time to make alternative plans. If not then at least you've told her ASAP.

Just be honest with her, she may be upset about it but I am sure she will be fine with it and understand especially as she understands the cost of paying for a Wedding.

I am surprised that she is booking through a company though as from my experience, going abroad for a Hen Do is often cheaper than staying in the UK. Obviously it depends when you book but when abroad there's no need to book through a company as the nights out are so cheap especially when bars realise that you are a Hen Do. The Hen usually gets a wrist band to have free drinks and for 5 euros each you get 2 drinks and 2 shots. I think the most I spent on a night out abroad on a hen do was 20 euros.

I have been to Ibiza and Tenerife on Hen Do's. Ibiza cost me £250 tops including flights accom transfers ad spending money (this was a bank holiday weekend) and Tenerife cost me slightly more as it was for 5 days and I booked a little later but was probably £350 tops again including everything.

I am going to Tenerife for mine in April but I made sure I asked that everyone was ok with this as I wanted everyone to be there and asked about a top budget from everyone so that nobody felt overwhelmed or worried about the price. As it is, The budget is £300 a person, but we should be able to get it cheaper than that as we are (hopefully) going to book next month as that's when the flights come out.

My friend, who is getting 2 days before me, had her hen party in Barcelona. Her and her friends could afford that, but my hen do I had a small pub crawl because me, my SILs and best friend don't have that kind of money to splash (it would have been nice, but too much stress). For that reason she wouldn't dislike you for opting out of the hen do, but like the others said make sure you tell her ASAP so nothing gets booked and finalised. She will understand that you have your own wedding to plan and pay for.

I think when people plan their hen do abroad they have to take into account that not everybody can make it. Even if you dont go abroad but have a weekend away somewhere it is unreasonable to expect and demand that everybody should go. I think its improtant for the bride to stress to everybody that she wont be upset if people cant make it.

Even if people have hundreds of pounds to spend it doesnt mean they will want to! You have to try and keep into perspective that although you may want a totally amazing hen do for everybody else it is 'just a hen do'.

When she initially thought about going abroad she should have known that she wouldnt have 100% attendance and if she didnt they she was a bit silly in my opinion.

I am sure she will understand- if she doesnt then she isnt a true friend. You could always organise a small gathering/ night out back in this country as a gesture.

I agree with MrsCross2b. Maybe you could arrange something in the UK for her? I'm sure she'll understand if you tell her ASAP xxx

I'm sure I've voiced my PERSONAL OPINION on here before about these lavish hen dos...

They can be quite selfish and OTT... I mean, I personally have friends from all walks of life with mixed incomes. This means each has different priorities, some live far away, some have kids, some have other responsibilities or jobs that are relatively inflexible.

I think more than £150 per person is OTT and I even think more than £100 to include a hotel if needs be is extravagant and should only be done where the finance isn't expected to come from everyone on the hen do.

We did my mates hen do for less than £80 pp inc a hotel room. We shared a lift to nottingham paintball, got a deal on that, got a room for £20 pp in the 1B1S hotel and one of the girls made a cake, went to the r3d h0t w0rld buff3t and then out for some drinks after. We bought the usual paraphernalia augmented by one of the girls things from her recent hen do (she'd been married 6 months before) so was preloved.

it was more than enough. And all that covered the hen for the night too. I may have spent another £30 in town on drinks too but most people fork out on top of the costs being discussed on that too.

Maybe organise her a good last p1ss up as an unmarried lady in the UK. Explain why.