Me and my partner are undecided as to have an open bar at our wedding reception. I have seen peoples days be ruined because people dont no when enough is enough when its free. Any thoughts and ideas about this would be appreciated x
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CommentAuthorAlexK
I'd just have a certain amount of drinks per person (either vouchers or at arrival/table so a few people don't get them all). The main issues with open bar (in my opinion) are A) people not knowing when to stop and B) not knowing the cost unless you put a limit, in which case some people may miss out. It depends on your friends/family if you think it would be appreciated or abused.
CommentAuthorButton-Bell
i have to hire in a bar so im only puttin a tab for me and the wedding party the guest will have to pay but its costing me a few hundred to hire them in so the guest shouldnt complain there gettin free food n travel there
i think its the norm to have a free bar but in the end it wither you can afford it or not xxx
CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
I would not have a totally free bar, a few drinks maybe per person but stop at that.
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorLauraJo87
At all the wedding receptions I've heard of, bar one, it was a cash bar, so I don't think your guests would expect a free bar.
I would echo concerns about guests taking advantage, the one I went to where there was a free bar, they almost drank it dry (only wine left) and everyone was falling over and being sick. On top of the total cost which ran into thousands, they had to pay an additional 1600 in damage and cleaning costs.
I've been to several open-bar events, and no-one got any drunker than they would have at a cash-bar event; if anything a lot of people, myself included, were perhaps a little more careful than normal as they didn't want to look greedy. I personally wouldn't invite people to my wedding who I thought might get so drunk that they caused damaged; that's just not the type of people I associate with, and I'm of the belief that only selfish, ignorant people behave like that, and they'll behave like that regardless of whether the alcohol is free.
However, we're not having an open bar, as I think it's very dangerous; our venue is very expensive, with cocktails for instance costing £12-15, so a true open bar could run into the £4-5k mark even if guests didn't drink an awful lot.
Our compromise is including drinks during the day, and having the bar open for those who wish to purchase different/additional drinks to those on offer. We are then putting £2k behind the bar from the start of the evening reception; this can ONLY be spent on house wine by the glass, beer, and certain single spirits and mixers. Anyone wishing to drink anything else eg sparkling wine/champagne/cocktails/premium spirits will have to pay for them themselves. This way, it should last a fairly long time, and we are also in control of how much is spent, and won't be worrying about the final bill as we've budgeted for it.
Basically, I don't buy the 'open bars make guests get stupidly drunk argument', because if they're that type of person, they'll get stupidly drunk regardless of whether or not they're paying; and if you have guests that you genuinely believe might be obnoxious (eg they have been in the past), I would questioning whether you should invite them at all. I don't think the bar is the issue; the guests are.
CommentAuthorAmyP7
I wouldn't have a free bar, we are having so many drinks included and if people want more than that they will have to buy more from the bar. We can't afford to pay for the drinks all night and I've never been to a wedding with a free bar so would never expect it x x
CommentAuthorTori
Unfortunately I do think some people do take the much when it is a free bar. They don't seem to appreciate that someone has to pay. I would go for a cash bar x
CommentAuthorStaceyP91
No way would i have a free bar in the evening. There already having arrival drinks which are pimms or champagne, wine with the meal & champagne for the toast.
xx
30-11-13 my life becomes complete
Mrs Solomon to be
CommentAuthorTatty
I was dead set against having a free bar but my mum's bf said he would like to pay for it as a wedding present. I talked to him about it and we have come to the conclusion that when people arrive they will be given drinks tokens, 4 each for any drink they like from the bar, this way they can't get too hammered x
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CommentAuthorElliekitty
edited
I've always found that people abuse it! Our friends but £1000 behind the bar and it went in 15 minutes! I personally would'nt do it and it's horrible that people expect you should pay for them when you already providing entertainment,venue and food!x
---Winter 2013 Bride ---
CommentAuthorMrs-Mouse-2-be
Free bar is an American thing that is sadly slowly catching on here :-( I say this because I think it's pretty bad that guests would expect a free bar.
CommentAuthorStaceyP91
there getting a 3course bloody meal free & buffet and other drinks... so cant see why people expect the evening bar to be free
xxx
30-11-13 my life becomes complete
Mrs Solomon to be
CommentAuthorlizzylou
I think most people expect a cash bar these days. I'd just provide plenty of wine or other drinks at the meal and then after that they can get there own. x
Lizzy. x
CommentAuthorMrs-Mouse-2-be
Be wary also that at free bars your guests may tend to get more drunk than normal. I know I won't have it but its your choice.
CommentAuthorBarbaraU
I dont think free bars are a good idea or putting money behind the bar either. My mam and dad did this for the 40th wedding aniverary and people who normaly only drank a half of larger or what ever were ordering double whiskey's and most of the people there were in their 60's. Have you not thought of a drinks package
CommentAuthorLynD
I went to a wedding a few years back where there was a free bar. The bride's uncles paid for it and there was a lot of alcohol drunk (and they didn't have an evening buffet or any food so people got legless) - I think it cost, between them, around the £4k mark.
Drinks tokens sound like a nice idea - but to be honest, if you're providing food and drink at the breakfast then that should be enough I reckons (maybe I'm a miser though.)
CommentAuthorPhoenixS
Thank you all for your replies, i think me and my partner will get 4-5 tokens for drinks for each guest then after that it will be a cash bar. Thank you all again :D xxx
CommentAuthorJackieFC
i went to a wedding recently, and the bar bill, for 150 guests, came to £6-7k so that was a decider for my partner and i, and instead we are giving our guests a voucher for their first drink on us :)
CommentAuthorDonda
We have 16 guests. We are providing welcome drinks (2 bottles of white wine & 2 red) then 4 bottles of Champagne for toast, other than that everyone is paying for their own drink and probably ours too LOL
Met on 7th April 2008
Got engaged on 14th November 2011
Getting married on 12th December 2012
Looking forward to the rest of my life with the man I love
CommentAuthorKristina
I was also planning to have one at my wedding, but then i decided against as i know that the family will use it like tap water.
But i am now putting money behind the bar and then after that is gone; they can pay for there own drinks.
Met: 1st February 2014
Engaged: 1st June 2014
Getting Married: 31st December 2014
CommentAuthormcquire81
We provided a generous drinks package for our guests during the wedding breakfast and just had a cash bar in the evening and everyone was fine with that, i think they even drank the bar dry of a few things! People wont expect a free bar and i wouldve been cautious to have one myself. We did give all the parents and wedding party a few vouchers each for drinks to have on our tab though as a small thank you xx
CommentAuthorBritSwissBride
It had never even entered our heads to have a free bar, however after sending our invites out we found out that Swiss weddings almost ALWAYS have a free bar! We actually had to phone people and say we are sorry but as it is a english wedding in england there will not be a free bar. We have though bought a drinks package which is 4 drinks each. Was kinda embarrassing having to explain to our Swiss guests. Although (I am sorry to say) the Swiss stereotype of english people is that we all drink too much so we kinda said we couldnt do a free bar as the english people would get too drunk! lol