Argh! Ready to scream - rant!

So the wedding is August and we were going to do bm dresses in June time to accommodate the bridesmaids - I've been getting worried about that because what happens if we can't find anything?! So I go online to see what we can find and amazingly (despite looking around for months), we find the PERFECT bridesmaids dress! It's not the norm, a bit different and so so pretty and feminine! It's blue, it's lacey, long length and with a tiny bit of sparkle in the belt so all the bases are covered

BM 1 loves it, BM2 loves it and MOH hasn't replied yet so waiting for her to get back to me. BM 2 however is causing a headache saying omg omg omg I love it, I want it, it looks gorgeous and practically drooling over it! Then when I say could you order it and see how it looks, she totally backtracks and says oh I'm not sure about the waistline and isn't it too soon as I want to loose weight? Ok, order in a size or two smaller if you are sure you are going to loose weight. Sorted you think? Oh NO! Another excuse - what if I waste money and it doesn't fit? It's a sale dress so you can't return! Ummmm, yes you can because I've checked... So now she's gone off to do work and says we'll discuss it later :(

She's always said, whatever you want, I'll wear but when it comes down to it, that's not really the case! I've compromised on everything for them - changed the colour scheme because they don't like it, making sure it's affordable for us all, ensuring that the dress has everything they want in it yet she's still not happy! We've always made sure that we run past the girls each dress we are thinking about and they get tossed in the reject pile if they don't like it. We always stress that we don't want them uncomfortable on the day but how are we supposed to please all of them???

BM 1 isn't a problem whatsoever and wants to get it and MOH has said just let me know which one and I'll wear it! It's so frustrating because it is the first bm dress that we genuinely love and it's one we really want so it's upsetting when we get negativity :(

ARGHHHHHH!!!!!

I think it sounds like there's something she's not telling you? Although what I'm not sure. Who's paying for the dresses, you and Debbie or the BMs? What sizes are the girls, similar or miles apart? X

Most bridesmaid dresses are ordered around this amount of time before a wedding, I went looking in bridal shops the other week and when I told them date, they were all like oh you need to order soon as they take a good 4 months to come in, I know online for not take as long but shows time. I would just say hey dress at cement current size and if you lose weight it can always be taken in. Sounds a bit to me like maybe she's not got the money for it at the moment even tho she said she loved it, was not prepared to be told to go ahead and order it.

I have to say I'm like that, I love something , really want it, but then at the last second have worries about money, and whether it will suit me etc.

Well the situation is resolved in that all the bm's agreed and loved it but cos it took so long for them all to reply, it sold out in the sizes we needed so it's back to square one :(

Oh no that really sucks. I'm going bridesmaid dress shopping next sat. The only stipulation I'd that its long and not red or ipswich town blue! I'm heavily involved in football so want a day away from things that remind me of football.

Hope you can find something else. X

The only one who's helping me with choosing BM dresses is my MOH! As I'm paying they'll get what their given is my approach lol sounds harsh but I can't stand people moaning for the sake of it :) xxx

I'm all for the bridesmaids being happy and comfortable but sometimes you need to put your foot down and let them know that even taking into consideration their thoughts and opinions, whatever you decide on is going to be what they wear. My girls have been a god send and have been happy with all the dresses I have shown them and have willingly said they will wear whatever I want them to wear because it is my special day.

I think the next one you find you should just go for! You don't want to slowly run out of time, leave it too late, then have to compromise on a dress just because you don't have enough time to find THE one.

Good luck xx

Mine have both agreed they are happy with the dress we have chosen.... but don't want me to order yet.... I think I'll wait until February and then ask what size they want me to order it in, I really don't think I can hold off until March to order them. It says it takes up to a month for delivery, I'm hoping I will see them both before May (my hen do) so they can try then on and then take them with them if they need any alterations (they both live away so that makes it all more difficult as well)

I changed my colours slightly for my girls, I wanted yellow dresses with purple flowers, they were going to go along with it, but I could tell they weren't happy so I asked if they'd prefer purple dresses with yellow flowers and they did.

Yep, for them and various other people. They were making our lives a misery and making it blatantly clear that they weren't happy nor would be on the day :( nothing on Ebay but it's much harder because 2 out of 3 bm's are plus size (24/26).. Most long length dresses seem to start at around £65 that are decent quality!

It looks lovely Catherine, where is it from?

Wow, that was quick! What do they think?

One of them hasn't replied, one of them likes them. She said she liked the bit going down the middle. They are really pretty, I also found one from the same seller with straps so sent that to them. If I get a response from them both I might see if I can push them to tell me a size and I'll order them tonight.... would love to just have them ordered and then we don't actually have any big things that need sorting before the wedding, it's just all the little details after that.

No, I don't think your wrong.

They've veto-ed too many dresses already, this is a nice dress and I'm sure there's not much they can say against them. By the sounds of it you need to be firmer with them and just get it sorted, we don't want to end up with naked bridesmaids do we ;)

Oh I don't know..... If they have no dress then we have no bm's... problem solved ;) x

Definitely - we will get them done tomorrow I think! Pregnant bm not sure :/

Thank you :) she is due on 1st March but will be delivered early so either way within the next 6 weeks. I was thinking maybe April/May time so she has time to adjust back? It looks pretty post-baby friendly!

Not at all, you're purple and I'm blue so it's irrelevant anyway. Glad you've found some you like!

Woohoo, that's fab! :D My sister needs to find a tape measure and our MOH hasn't even messaged back yet .. Helpfully though, she's based in Taunton which is really near us so we might pop in and do it in person during the Easter holidays!

Just ordered mine :) I was going to hold off, but noticed it said there were only 2 of the size 10's and 5 of the size 14's left.... I'm assuming she just puts 5 on at a time or something, but didn't want to take that risk.

A little less worried about the dresses going as we just gave them a ring and have arranged an appointment to go in to see them and get the dresses properly measured and fitted so yay! :)

I must say Catherine, I think I like those dresses better! Colour is gorgeous too. You were definitely right to not give them an option of liking it and saying 'this is THE dress' after all the dresses they vetted and discarded! Hopefully your pregnant BM feels more comfortable about it when she's had her baby. It's not that long to wait really. Sounds like its finally sorted! X

Yeah I think so too. I think you're right! Tell them if they are planning to lose any to start now so their dresses can be perfect for the day :) x

When you say 2-3 dress sizes smaller do you mean the dress can be made 2-3 sizes smaller by pulling in tighter or by having it altered?

Fab, I hope that's right as that would be brill for if mine lost the weight she wants to :)