Hi there I was wondering if anyone else had this kind of dilemma and how they sorted it. I chose to have four bridesmaids, My sister, my cousin, my best friend and one other friend. I have tried to arrange to meet up numerous occasions but not all of them are being co operative. My best friend had a baby back in May but I am thinking have I made the rite choice in asking her to be my bridesmaid as she is quite busy with the new born. My wedding isn't until May next year. But my sister is also not responding. The only one who is co operating the most is my cousin! Ahhhh it is annoying!!!
CommentAuthorRennie1989
Maybe ask your friend with the baby if she is able to be a bridesmaid, if you feel she may not be able to do much.
But yes, I did have similar problems. My best friend was the MOH but she did naff all. She didn't seem enthusiastic about the wedding and cared more about her own looks, she kept asking to try her dress on and how she wants her hair half up half down when I've said no at every occasion.. I decided to make H2B's older sister MOH and she's been fantastic, she planned a great hen party at very last minute and has helped with the whole wedding process.
CommentAuthorStaceyB5
Yes that is also another issue. My sister is doesn't like kitten heels so won't wear any shoes unless they are ridiculous inches. I am only short myself so I don't want my bridesmaids towering over me. She also wan't to wear her hair extensions which I am not keen on as I think they should look natural as possible but with still looking pretty. I think if my best friend doesn't co operate I may have to do the dreaded and think of something to say without being hurtful. The only thing is though, is her mum is doing our wedding photography as she does it for a living and making our cake so I don't want to upset her and maybe ruining the chance of us having her do it still :/ x
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
Thats what made me rethink my moh, it was going to be my bf but she does not seem to care and was like im not wearing this color , etc! At moment she will be lucky ti be a bm at all!
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
My bridesmaids haven't all met up... the best I did was my two sisters and best friend... with them all living all over the country (best mate is an airline pilot!) plus me being in the military makes it hard... Unfortunately, I think us brides can get a bit precious and stroppy over something not happening when it wasn't really reasonably practical! Best thing is ask them to book a weekend off work months in advance and make a big point of it... but some jobs do screw people over last minute. It's just life!
We bought our BM dresses without one of the BMs even trying it on... she's reallyeasy going though and she and me have similar figures so I tried it on for her!
And we lived happily ever after!
CommentAuthorRennie1989
I had the same problem as Valentina. My best friend and cousins live elsewhere in the country (best friend and cousins aren't close to each other either) from my SILs and myself. It was not impossible to all meet but it wasn't easy either. Some of my decisions had to be made in their absence.
CommentAuthorbarbie86
I'm really lucky with mine as they're my 4 best friends; 4 of us have known each other since we were tiny, and the other is just 'my' friend ie not part of the group, but they all get on. I think it gets trickier when it's a more diverse group, as in your case.
If it's something important like dress shopping, I'd maybe send a round-robin message with a selection of dates, and ask who's free on what day; if you give enough options, there SHOULD be one which suits everyone. Then, if your sister or friend are being awkward/uncommunicative I'd just ask them if they definitely want to be bridesmaids, or if it's too much for them, and give them the chance to step down. Otherwise, it's going to be extra stress for you that just isn't needed.
CommentAuthorBeckyU98
im lucky with my MOH as she is very enthusiastic - shes my best friend and H2B's cousin so shes very excited about the wedding. i have arranged dress appointments around my MOH as she works shifts and only has 1 weekend off a month. We chose the dresses and then just told the other bridesmaids what they were wearing and arranged for their fittings. they dont all necessarily need to be there at the same time. try and get one date where they can all be there for the first appointment and then thats probably all you need.
with regards to hair and makeup - theres not really much you can say apart from i would like you to look natural and not wear high heels - if you are paying for their hair makeup and shoes then you have the right to say what they are wearing - if you arent then youll need to be careful about pissing them off x
