Well....18 weeks to go til the wedding. My mothers cancer has spread and now in her lymph nodes, chemo starts next week. H2b has been waiting months for a major knee op (his original surgeon has retired and the hospital didn't refer him to another so I've been stalking the staff to make sure they know about him) then suddenly a date comes for the 3rd march. He's been told at least 3/4 months off because of the job he does then was told last night that because he had time off last year with the first op that didn't work he won't get full pay, only half pay. And that will leave us short for day to day living plus at least a grand short for the wedding. I don't want to cancel but have definatly lost the love for the wedding. CBA to do anything even though the night time invites need writing and there's loads still to do :( sorry for the rant but it actually helped to get it all off my chest. Xx
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
ohhhh hun,
1, so sorry to hear about your mum 2,your hubby should have been seen by whoever took over previous surgeon case load 3, who told him re pay ..... he needs to look at the sickness procedure in his contract to make sure or contact HR dept 4, keep your chin up , we are all here for you
Oh hun that sucks big time! Did you get wedding insurance, because with your OHs opp and your mums illness it may be grounds to postpone until it feels right.
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorRachelE118
Thanks both. Stupidly didn't bother with insurance as wedding budget so small (£7k) and as it's a long standing condition we probably wouldn't have been covered anyway. He's arranged a meeting with HR next week so fingers crossed. Xx
CommentAuthorAna40
Rachel it sounds like it's quite a stressful time for you and your family. I do hope got are all managing with support. Could you get insurance now? X
Sorry to hear about your mum, I can't imagine what you're going through. I hope you're fiance's op is successful and his meeting with HR has a good outcome. As Ana40 said I think you can take wedding insurance out up until a certain time before the wedding so might be best to look into it. xx
“Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
-Ambrose Bierce
CommentAuthorRachelMarie
So sorry about your mum hope ur hubby to be can get things sorted with work xx could u not put the last few bits on a 0% credit card and pay it of after the wedding when hubby is back at work ? Would be a shame to postpone it so close to the wedding or if u could cut back on anything? Xx
CommentAuthorAllishiaW
I just want to send big hugs to you!! Firstly sorry about your mum!! Secondly as I think it's classed as long term sick would you not be able to get help like ESA?!? Oh and because his op will take place after the nex tax year starts it might be covered on full pay?!? (Could be wrong thinking this-but I know with my job a new tax year wipes off any sickness I've had etc and starts again) Could he take some of his holiday?! It might not be a lot but might help a little?! And as Rachel said although not everyone's choice,could you not get a loan of credit card to help with costs?! X
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
Allishia .. the thing with sick pay is it very much depends how the company work ..for example i am entitled to 6 months on full pay and six months on half pay ... but this is done on a rolling year NOT financial year so in order to get this i have to have a year free of sickness , the people from HR will sort this for you
You may get Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) if your illness or disability affects your ability to work and you’re:
under State Pension age not getting Statutory Sick Pay or Statutory Maternity Pay and you haven’t gone back to work not getting Jobseeker’s Allowance You can apply for ESA if you’re employed, self-employed, unemployed or a student on Disability Living Allowance.
You may get ESA if you’ve lived or work abroad and paid enough National Insurance (UK or equivalent).
Thanks all for your help. Yes his sick is on a rolling year :( he's hoping to use some leave and ask if they can reduce his forward pay. They might say no but it's worth a try. I've worked out that a bit of careful spending we will only be about £800 short. Could be far worse! Xx
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
They will be able to tell him for sure how much time he has left on full pay ... He is better being signed off at the start then using holiday at the end ( if they ok this )
Be careful about using leave, as there was a courtcase a few years ago, because a company was making people use leave instead of sick, and it was said that you should only use leave if your on leave and sick if your sick, as i nearly took my company to court due to being advised by my manager to take holiday instead of sick after my car accident saying if i was on sick before my maternity i would not get signed off for my maternity.
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorKatya
Sorry to hear of your rocky road hun i hope.everything works out for.you i.really do.
Lana that is discusting.... I was working at mcdonalds when.pregnant.with my eldest. I over did things (my own.fault not.theirs) & got.rushed to hospital by work for.bleeding. I spent approx 1months in hospital on 2 separate occasions, had 6weeks off work. ( they rushed me in spent 2wks in hosp, 2wks at home resting then back to work for 3days before being rushed to hospital.by work again) got forced by doc to take early maternity, i got paid sick pay just before maternity. No problems at all images(despite nearly losing my son, but no problems with sick pay verses maternity)
Find out who you are & do it on purpose!
CommentAuthorAllishiaW
Ahhhh thought that might be the case lala x
CommentAuthorRachelE118
Hi all I've just had a thought....he gets full sick for 3 months then half for 3 months but in a rolling year. He was off feb to mid May last year then a month in December. So if they do work on a rolling year then wouldnt he be entitled to full sick again from April/may this year? Xx
CommentAuthorNataleeM
big hugs hunny xxxxxxxxxx
Can not wait until I marry the man of my DREAMS
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
on a rolling year they will go from the first day he is off sick with this ... then go back to the same time last year and look at what time he has had off inbetween
eg .. if as you say he get 3mths full and 3 mths half and he is off from 1st march 2014 ,they go to march 2013 and calculate how much time he has had off
(feb to mid may = 14 weeks approx but only from march would count this time )
march to mid may = 10 weeks approx December = 4 weeks
so he would have already had approx 14 weeks on full pay so this time he would be on half pay
obviously all of this depends on when he has his op this time
