After a long talk and scrutinising our budget, we've decided that instead of getting married at the local register office (with 40 people), and an evening reception for around 120, as well as honeymoon (costing in the region of £5000 - £5500 even 'cutting corners') - we think it would be a better option to do it at Gretna Green.
We noticed they do wedding packages which will save us booking everything separately, and the scenery for the photos will be so much better. The only problem we have is, because we're on a tight budget, we were thinking of cutting the number of invites down to around 20 - and asking the 20 who want to come to pay for their own accommodation. Is this right or should we be paying for it?
We are considering having a meal after the ceremony and paying for that but the accommodation as well would be just too much for us. I've just told my parents - my dad was a bit quiet but understood about the budget issue, but my mum was very off hand and all I got from her was 'not may people will come'. I did tell her that it's their loss not ours if they don't as it's our day - but she wasn't exactly excited about coming either (and after all I am an only child so you'd think she would be happy).
After all my h2b and myself are forking out for everything, as my parents haven't offered to pay for anything yet - and h2b doesn't see his parents - so you can see our dilemna.
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
I don't see why you should pay for accomodation. H2B and I have travelled all over the country to weddings and paid for hotels. Most of our guests will need hotels (wherever we had it in the country). I think its quite normal to pay for your own hotel.
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthor
I agree with Dove - I've never had my accommodation paid for and some of it has been quite pricey including the Randolf in Oxford at £160 quite a few years ago now.
CommentAuthormym72
Thanks - I'm really glad people agree with me that we're not being mean not paying for people. Now I'll put it to the 20 and see who wants to come...
CommentAuthorGoff
I dont think you are being mean - after all if you got married abroad you wouldnt pay for everyones flights!
UKB Mad Scientist
Ride it like ya stole it.....
I'm a flippin ORTHOTIST
im getting married at the mill forge in gretna green were having 27 guests coming with us n they r paying for their own rooms weve paid for the meals n everything else but like u said its 2 expensive no1 has complained about having to pay every1 was given the option of coming n they all still wanted 2 come
CommentAuthormym72
We're hoping to get the Gretna Hall Linton Suite as it holds upto 20 people. I'm giving them a ring tomorrow and just hoping they're not fully booked. I looked into Smiths hotel and restaurant and for the date we want (6th August 2011) it was coming up full. If we managed to book for 20 and less turn up at least we'll have the venue. We've got alternative dates around the 6th though so hopefully we'll get one of them. How much in advance did you book Jodie?
CommentAuthorjodie
i booked my wedding on 29th october last year n im gettin married in 6 weeks n 5 days so not long in advance the mill was fully booked on weekends apart from the 6th march so we booked it there n then the smiths place has been getting some bad reviews lately has been taken off some sites that u can book ur packages on so be careful if u end up there we went 4 a drive up 2 gretna n had a look round the different places n we prefered the mill weve booked it all ourselves rather than a package
CommentAuthormym72
We've only just come up with the idea earlier today so it didn't cross our minds to book it separately. Do you save much from the packages doing it that way? I know there's a few things in the packages offered (like flowers) that we'd prefer to do ourselves, and maybe transport - but I was thinking it might be better to take a drive up and see things for ourselves.
CommentAuthorMrs Buzzlightyear
when you send out your invites put in a list of hotels covering all budgets, the travel lodge will only be £30 a nite or something then your guests can sort there own hotel within there own budget
Cant wait for my Tiffany & co, wedding - July 16th 2011
CommentAuthormym72
I've just been looking up hotels - I'll do that then at least they can make up their own minds. With only inviting a few close relatives though (just a few first cousins/spouses as our family is quite close, my aunty, parents, h2b's cousin and brother and my son) I might be able to get numbers quite early so that I'll know how many to book for the meal as well. I'm getting quite excited about it all now....it's a shame it isn't til August 2011 lol.
CommentAuthorMrs Daltry
our guests that are traveling are paying for their own accomadation,iv just put a local tourist booklet in their invites listing all available hotels and b&b's
CommentAuthorjodie
weve paid 250 4 the venue 110 for the minister 256 for a photographer thats with our album and 2 parents albums, the food is 23.85 i think each n 8.25 for kids drinks are around 9 each 4 adults n 4 for the kids hairdresser is 55 4 my hair n make-up 40 each 4 adult bridesmaids n 20 for kids hair the reception is free if theres over 40 guests from all the weddings they do that day we dont need any cars because were staying in the same place as the wedding and where the mill forge is there lovely views over the fields where as the other places are mostly in the village so its all roads n buildings i think anyway we had a drive around gretna green but fell inlove wi the mill which was the first place we looked at so might not have been looking properly at the others lol
CommentAuthorjodie
oh its alot cheaper 4 a minister 2 preform the service than a registrar think its over 200 for the registrar plus u still have 2 hire the room where as the minister is only 110
CommentAuthorheavenlystar
im getting married at the mill but i think it will just be the two of us do you think we will be ok??
CommentAuthormrsriley2b
Hiya,
We are planning on getting married at gretna and face the same dilema, but after much debate, we came to the conclusion that we take the people we most want there (managed to get it down to around 40, which isn't that many considering the sizes of our families!), and we will be getting the guests to pay for own accommodation, apart from mother of groom, bridesmaid etc.
Then a little while after the wedding we are having a party in Aberdeen with my family to celebrate then when we get back home to Hessle have another party for family and friends that couldn't come.
It's your and your hubby to be's day, and it's you two hat need to be happy above anybody else. x
CommentAuthorRyans Mummy
Im also getting married at the mill forge and we are staying at the dryfesdale hotel. We are paying for our guests accomodation because we were worried that very close family wouldnt be able to afford it and we really wanted them there. Since telling them though they have said they didnt expect us to pay for it - wish id know that before we said we would pay because its costing us an extra £1400!
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
A friend of mine got married up there and had a great time. Guests will pay for their own accommodation so don't worry about it.
CommentAuthormrsbriggs
were looking at gretna was looking at the packages for the smiths hotel . was gonna have close family with us then a party for everyone else when we get back esp given bout 100 were invited to our engagement party. were trying to pay for it ourselves and save up for a house. gonna look into the idea of the mill forge. anyone else have any advice on the smiths any reason for the bad reviews.
CommentAuthortinkerbell
Its not yor place to pay for your guest accomadation , if they want to share your happy day with u , they will be there nomatter what .Its better to have people their who care rather than people wanting a free piss up. Tohelp cut cost we are buying our own bottles of drink to have with the meal and paying for the corkage which is cheaper then paying the bottle prices at Whitcroft mansion. Every one iv spoke to on here has had nothing but good words to say about all the venue's that Gretna have to offer . Iv seen our venue a Comlongon Castle and it took my breath away . Any feedback on anyone who has got married their would be fab
CommentAuthormym72
bump
CommentAuthorVintageChic
thanks mym :D
"Who, being loved, is poor?" -Oscar Wilde
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CommentAuthorMummy Geri
If I get married in gretna then everyone will be sorting out their own accomodation. Its going to be costly enough forking out £30+per head for the meal after lol so am with you on that :) xx
bride-to-be Geri
CommentAuthorMummy Geri
just realised I would be just as well going with doing it myself or at the hotel by the time travel expences etc come into it lol oh well xx
bride-to-be Geri
CommentAuthormym72
Geri - we got married at Gretna 6 weeks ago, and we couldn't fault it!! We booked through the bureau, had the ceremony at Gretna Hall Linton Suite and our reception at the Solway Lodge hotel.
The bureau were brilliant organising things, even getting us a minister. I know Gretna used to have a reputation for kids running off to get married - but that was before the laws changed, when they could only get married at 16 in Scotland. It's a lot different now - as all ages go there. We visited earlier in the year and finished up being witnesses for a couple in their 60's!! lol
On our wedding day we expected loads of brides to be floating around in cars as it's not a massive place - and I did have the vision that it was going to be a bit like a conveyor belt of weddings - but I was definitely wrong. In fact, apart from one other wedding in another room of our hotel, we didn't see another wedding car at all.
The people up there are so friendly and bend over backwards to accommodate you. When we visited last year, they even let us look round the wedding venue and went through everything that would happen on the day. When we enquired about the reception venue, we only asked for leaflets - and got the full tour of the place and any questions answered!!
We had a small wedding (less than 20 of us) but most places up there cater for all sizes of weddings - and some hotels are even licensed to conduct weddings if you don't want the traditional blacksmiths etc.
On our wedding day it actually rained a bit (on and off) but there was still loads of indoor places for pics within the blacksmiths building (think they're ready for days like that lol). And we're not over religious but did want a minister instead of a registrar - and we couldn't fault ours. He was lovely, and put us at ease the moment we met him. In fact, he's now a friend on fb lol.
If you need any more advice or links to any services/hotels that we used, let me know and I'll stick them on your profile x
CommentAuthorMummy Geri
Aww that sounds nice hun. The only thing is because I have about 60 guests (mostly family, 55) there would be travelling, then the meals etc. I added mine up to come to about £4300 inc. reception. I may aswell just have it in sunny edin (LOL) and save a bit travelling and put the money towards the honeymoon. Just getting ideas just now so all welcome lol xx
bride-to-be Geri
CommentAuthorMummy Geri
but yes please do feel free to post links :) xx
bride-to-be Geri
CommentAuthormunchkinpie
Hi Mym72 - hope you dont mind me intruding but im waiting to hear from Solway Lodge regarding reception. Any info would be fab!
I had wanted to have the whole thing at Comlongon Castle but aside from the cost its just too many hurdles to overcome with the fact that we have far too many guests than they can provide accommodation for and I don't want my family and friends with young children having to travel to far from reception to a hotel for the night.
Every single person who comes (80 or so) will have travelled as Im from Glasgow and oh is from Essex and we live in Essex but thought it fair we meet somewhere in middle and since we stop off in Gretna en route 3-4 times a year it has a special little place in our hearts.
Working on a 3 dream plan for the next 5 years!
Dream 1 = My gorgeous Mr P proposed - 4/9/11 Sydney Harbour
Dream 2 = Getting Married Easter 2012 by Bonnie Loch Lomond
Dream 3 = Working on that dream life in Australia
CommentAuthorShirleygirly
If my parents hadn't offered to pay the lions share then we would be looking at Gretna. If your parents aren't happy with the arrangement then perhaps they could give you some advice on how to have their dream wedding on your budget. Anyone who loves you will be happy to pay for accommodation. Some of my guests live locally nut love the hotel that I'm hoping to book so much that they will be booking rooms. It's not your responsibility to pay accommodation, you're buying them all dinner thats pricey enough. Hope your mind is put at ease, there's enough to think about right now. x
I can't wait until 29/06/2013
The day I marry the man of my dreams!
CommentAuthormym72
munchkinpie - the first thing I'd say about the Solway Lodge is, if you have any enquiries at all, give them a ring and ask to speak to Iain. He tends to deal with everything to do with weddings - and he'll bend over backwards to make your day perfect.
The hotel isn't massive (about 20 rooms - some upstairs and some motel style next to the main hotel). Some of our wedding party were in the motel style rooms - but even they were a good size (single rooms were actually twin, with good size en suite bathrooms as well). We were upstairs and had a four poster bed (which was a lovely touch for the wedding).
The wedding menu is very extensive. We initially had 9 choices for each course, then had to knock it down to five choices for each course for the guests to choose from - and for the 3 course meal it worked out to be around £25 per head. The quality and quantity was fantastic as well - in fact not one of the guests complained about a thing. They all mentioned how good the food was though.
If you want wine as well, again, speak to Iain. He organised a good price for us and advised how many bottles we'd actually need (we were over estimating lol).
The hotel has a function room (I think it holds up to 200) but as we just had a small party, we had sole use of the restaurant (another wedding was using the function room but the two weddings were completely separate and we still got the best service). In the evening we went into the hotel bar and were allowed our own CD's to be played (although if you want a dj again speak to Iain as he has a list of local suppliers/services etc that he'd be able to send you).
I hope all this is useful - but get in touch if you want to know anything else x
CommentAuthormym72
oh forgot to mention - if the Solway isn't big enough for accommodation for your whole party, there are a few small hotels next door and a couple of doors down. Some of our guests stayed there - and as they're not licenced, the guests tend to use the Solway Lodge bar (I know I've said it before, but Iain will be able to help with names lol). Love that man - he defintely was the best and puts you at ease with your planning as soon as you talk to him lol...
CommentAuthorSoonToBe
Opening up a old thread again!!
So me and OH will be eloping (just the 2 of us) Need a bit of advise from people that have eloped or wed there.
So I'm just trying to work out what to do after the service? Obviously well have a meal but I don't know whether I should stay in my dress or not? I really want to get the most out of it but will I look silly with just the 2 of us eating on our tod? Or would you opt for a nice evening dress to change in for dinner? Argh I can't make my mind up x
CommentAuthorLittle Kettle
Slightly different, but we got married in Vegas. I had the same dilemma, but decided to stay in my dress. Best thing I could have done! Although it's not Vegas, it is Gretna, and I'd imagine that they are very used to brides rocking up in their dresses for dinner. I say go for it!
Vegas baby!
Moderator
CommentAuthorSoonToBe
Thank you and very true.
I will just rock my dress all day :)
CommentAuthorprincesspixie
i'd definitely stay in the dress I'm convinced once I'm in mine i won't be taking off ever… will probably end up doing the shopping in it lol xx
Officially married my best friend 2/5/2015 (secretly)
Big wedding 18/06/2016
CommentAuthorSoonToBe
I'll keep a eye out for the crazy lady shopping in her wedding dress... Haha.
I'm not very confident but after thinking about it I think I'll wear it with pride :) and as Little Kettle said its Gretna, I'm sure their used to it by now ;)
CommentAuthorMrsThomson2B
Find out how much a bus would cost and then just ask people to contribute to the cost of the bus. Anyone who is wanting to stay cantravel there themselves and for those who don't want to stay but have a few drinks they know that transport is arranged xx